MAD LOVE UNSPOKEN...

I know it's a cornball thing, but love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? I say fall head over heels. Find someone you love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart... Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because the truth is, there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love -- well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived... Stay open. Who knows? Lightning could strike...

Stay happy!

BOUNCE BACK SANDZ!!!

The past few months have been nerve-racking, heart breaking even and most of all painful to me.. I don't know what the hell did I do to deserve these kind of things to happen... Didn't know how to react, but I know what I did was right... I followed my heart and not what the norm of our society requires... I kept it all in silence...

For the first time in my life I didn't retaliate... or let myself be consumed by anger... I've been down for so long and the events that had happened did not make it any easier, instead it pressed and even pushed me to my lowest... Second thoughts torment me like hell but like what I said "No regrets."

Now I know, I'm coping.. I know i'll be alright... I'm learning to smile away each stab... Slowly but surely i'm becoming numb... Like I said no one has to shoulder the guilt... No one has to apologize...

These events are just like dominoes in my life... All of it will end at some point, and surely when the last one falls, by then I will no longer feel the pain. I'd be really desensitized by then... And maybe just maybe through it all, it has already taught me to smile away each pain, choose the right decisions and bounce back higher than the last time...

Missing...

There's something missing...
It ain't complete...
Yes I am happy right now
But beneath the happiness lurks a feeling i just cannot contain...
I miss that old feeling...
The feeling of being so much in love...
the feeling of being ecstatic whenever I amwith someone i deeply connect...
Someone I really love...
I miss the feeling of having someone to lean on to, to hold on to...
a hand that never let goes, to hug, to kiss, to play around with...
I miss being so sweet and caring...
I miss the feeling of being needed by someone...
I miss the feeling of having fun, the sweet conversations, hanging around with really nothing to do but having that assuring feeling that I don't have to worry because I amwith the one I love...

No I don't miss any particular person... It's just that feeling i really miss.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

1. Raining makes every place gloomy... Well for me in this case... Why does it have to follow that if the place is gloomy I too become one with it?

2. When will all this end? Setbacks pile up... But hey, proud to say I've learned to smile, laugh at it and sometimes even do nothing about it...

3. Playing's tough! Most of the time I'm at the LOSING END but it's not the WINNING im really after... It's how I played in the GAME...

4. You're here somewhere... Friends say I've improved but still show the opposite... Whatever?!!! Ok, I must admit you make me smile every damn single day even at my bad days... I already thought about it and made a decision that we'll be forever just like this, fooling around, share a lot of laughs, sometimes a few sweet moments, but no meanings, no attachments... I'll just enjoy them...

5. I miss IVEE and MINDA...

6. Want to hit the beach again. think of nothing, feel the wind on my face, swim, feel the sand on my feet and most of all throw all my worries away with the waves...

7. It's not bad being SINGLE, actually I am loving it right now, no worries... It's just that sometimes even I have my super loving friends, it's still kinda lonely...

8. I need to fix my finances!!! Damn!!!

9. Thank you KATTS ... I know you know why...

10. Chocolate cake, Tiramisu meltdown, Mango crepe, Mango ice candy... Haaay sweets!!! Signaling that the time of the month is nearing...

*I need a big and warm hug... Haaay?! Ayan my head and heart hurts all over again...